Walking in Community and Accountability are not just nice ideas. Within the depth of these concepts is the unlocking of your ability to change the world.
When you begin walking in sonship community life skills and accountability:
- You make a difference.
- Core values develop that guide you — you are not swayed by opinion or peer pressure or false comforts.
- Growth of your sonship identity deepens.
- You realize your destiny path.
This is our 7th lesson in our 10-part series on Principles of Growth and Maturity to Reach Your Destiny and our third and final lesson on Sonship.
On your path towards Sonship, you have come to the realization that you are loved as a child of God; you have a security in that love; and you understand what builds a healthy identity and what tears it down.
So you are now ready to apply all of this in community.
Community Life Skills
When I speak of community life skills, I mean functioning well with people in a group. In your actions and dialogue you are able to flow with the giving and receiving of community life.
- Giving – You are comfortable in your own skin and in your giftings and talents and give of them freely to benefit others.
- Receiving – You are able to receive the contribution of others with joy and without any spirit of competition or jealousy.
You can even flow with the compromises you sometimes have to make for the good of the group, and you intuitively and graciously know when to let something go and when to speak up.
Two Keys to Community Life Skills
There are two main keys to walk in healthy community:
- No perfectionism —don’t expect perfection from others (or yourself). We all have faults and we all are on our own journeys towards maturity.
- Contribution —approach community from the standpoint of what you can contribute. It’s not about who’s good enough or not; in other words, no comparisons. It is simply asking, “What can I contribute to the benefit of the whole?”
First of all, accountability is not a bad word (even though many of us may have a negative feeling about it).
To understand accountability in a healthy light, it must be approached after security and dialogue are established. Then it becomes a source of safety and empowerment.
As you grow in sonship, you start to desire greater responsibility and contribution, but you understand that accountability is the means to help you achieve that.
Community Life Skilss Lessons
Being in community causes us to grow; it teaches us many lessons about:
- Love – Learning to function well in community teaches you to love, and love will flourish into healthy relationships. You learn even to love difficult people and gain important skills of maturity in human relations.
- Talents – You learn your natural strengths and weaknesses as you participate in community.
- Core Values – Values are being developed from the things that are most meaningful to you and match your natural talents. You learn passion to help others from losses you have faced and processed.
All of this adds up to you reaching your destiny.
The Pareto Principle
(also known as The 80–20 Rule, The Law of the Vital Few)
We have long heard that 20% of the people do most of the work and giving at the average church. But what about the other 80%? Have they opted out of community? God has so much more.
We hear countless sermons on exhortations to serve. However, most of the time, people haven’t followed the Road Map to be in a position to serve. They try to walk in community without ever first learning security and dialogue. Many personal conflicts and disputes arise from this simple fact.
So these are the true steps to Sonship — Security, Dialogue, Community and Accountability. Growing in the security of your identity in God, learning skills of dialogue and keeping your heart open all lead to the ability to be held accountable and work well in community.
Now you should have a much better picture of your path into your calling and destiny.
Talk to You Soon
I look forward to communicating with you next time when I’ll cover Fathering Leadership – Creating a Culture of Nurture and Growth.
Do you have a question about any of this? Feel free to contact me. All email goes to my personal inbox and I will be happy to respond in a timely fashion.
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This lesson is Part 7 of a 10-part course on Principles of Growth and Maturity to Reach Your Destiny.
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